When I received my cancer diagnosis, I felt I'd been hauled into a horror movie in which I was playing a key role, but hadn't been given the script. I felt lost, mortal, frightened. The people and landmarks around me looked the same, but no one could understand me. People I had known all my … Continue reading Cancer is the Loneliest Place
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How to Talk to Someone With Cancer
Acknowledge their pain. It's an age-old, time-tested way to bring comfort those who are suffering. When I was going through the cancer grinder, I directly experienced the healing power of feeling seen. And conversely, the distressing effect of not feeling seen. This post will unpack the meaning of these words and offer concrete examples of … Continue reading How to Talk to Someone With Cancer
Inside the Mind of a Cancer Patient
One thing I didn’t realize until I got cancer is how opaque the experience of cancer is from the outside. We live our lives assuming that what we see is all there is. So and so’s hair has grown back; they must have recovered. We believe we see the whole experience when, in reality, we … Continue reading Inside the Mind of a Cancer Patient
One-Year Survivor: The Good, the Bad, the Hope
A year ago, I was undergoing cancer treatment. This month, I am celebrating my one-year survivorship. It is a big milestone on many levels. I underwent so much pain and so many sorrows. I am grateful for life, even though the hardships are not over. I enjoy the present moment a lot more than I … Continue reading One-Year Survivor: The Good, the Bad, the Hope
Why I Became a Patient Advocate
Last year, I got diagnosed with breast cancer. My life fell apart. I lost my health, my energy, my job, my enthusiasm, my sleep, my appetite. My brain got sluggish. I was lost. Lethargic. Uninspired. Then I started treatment. It was brutal. I shrank my sense of time to smaller units. I wasn't thinking about … Continue reading Why I Became a Patient Advocate
An Insider View of Radiation Therapy Through the Eyes of a Cancer Patient
A few months ago, I underwent month-long daily radiation therapy for breast cancer. It was hard for my frail rail-thin body. The treatment left me physically, emotionally, and mentally depleted — like nothing I had experienced before. Several months after completion, I still suffer the side effects. (I know survivors who remain affected many years down the … Continue reading An Insider View of Radiation Therapy Through the Eyes of a Cancer Patient
Refuge Among Redwoods (Poem)
Taking refuge in the forest / Amidst the tall redwoods / Majestic protectors / Of all things living. / Their cracked brown skin / Brings to mind my brown ancestors / Still alive among these trees / Centuries after centuries. / Their resilience exemplary / Their strength legendary / They’ve overcome severe hardships / With awe-inspiring ...
Letter to My Forgotten Heart
When I finished cancer treatment, I sank into grief, and became acutely aware of the fragility of life, and the human heart. It was clear that my body had suffered a great deal. But I also viscerally realized that my heart had been beaten up and terrified by cancer treatment. One night, I felt inspired … Continue reading Letter to My Forgotten Heart
How to Respond to “How Are You?” When You Are Not Okay
Many people are unaware of how difficult it is to answer social greetings when one is going through hardships. They ask "how are you" mechanically, without thinking. I too have done so in the past. My experience of cancer opened my eyes to the stress of social greetings. All the sudden, I became one of … Continue reading How to Respond to “How Are You?” When You Are Not Okay
When Life Kicks You: Let it Kick You Forward
The kick came for me in the form of breast cancer. Cancer has a way of showing up in your life, unannounced, and take up all the space in the house. It’s a visitor you can’t ignore. Rowdy. Overburdening. Demanding. Draining. It derails your routine, your plans, your work, your sleep, and your relationships. You … Continue reading When Life Kicks You: Let it Kick You Forward